EMOTIONAL, MENTAL & MIND HEALTH


SUICIDE AND DEPRESSION


LIVING WITH DEPRESSION & SUICIDAL THOUGHTS

 

John, 6/23/10

 

 

Don’t be so surprised that many people live with depression and live fairly well and may even experience times of happiness, pleasure and joy.

 

That’s right, many depressed people never go to any therapists or take psychiatric medicines. Some get worse, but many go down from 2 weeks to a year and come out of it. If they have chronic depression, it may start as early as childhood. They will go into a cycle of depression that gets worse in their teen years, it sometimes eases off in a college environment, gets worse under the stresses of jobs, marriages, children, death of loved ones, financial stresses, etc. but then near retirement it may ease off again, get worse in a retirement home or more deaths of loved ones, etc.

 

THIS MAY UPSET YOU

 

Many suicidal & depressed people (The two don’t always go together) kill themselves while under the care of a professional therapist & while using psychiatric drugs or self medicating with alcohol, street drugs or prescriptions drugs and any combination of them. Some suicidal people do it in order to kill someone they hate or “love too much to see them suffer” and they avoid family criticism, criminal prosecution and jail this way. Killing yourself can be the sin of murder, especially if you are not depressed.

 

Ok, these are the facts, now what can we do about it?  Let’s learn more. There are two main types of depressed people:  

 

  1. THERE ARE DEPRESSED PEOPLE WITH SUICIDAL THOUGHTS WHO NEVER KILL THEMSELVES & DON’T EVEN ACT IN RASH OR RISKY BEHAVIORS, BECAUSE THEY DON’T LIKE PAIN OR INJURY OR ACCIDENTAL DEATH.                                                                                                                                               
  2. THERE ARE PEOPLE WHO CAN BE IN GOOD OR BAD CIRCUMSTANCES, BUT THEY ARE RULED BY THE THOUGHT OR IDEA OF SUICIDE & THEY ATTEMPT IT.

 

Some of the motivations for the ones with suicidal thoughts, who never kill themselves:

Fear of God/Hell, fear of botching the job and becoming disabled and unable to kill themselves ever, and fear that their children/friends/strangers will follow their example. Some of their wise behaviors:  they don’t overstress themselves with alcohol, drugs or medicines that don’t work or have side effects, so their natural instinct at self-preservation is still intact and very strong. They also may have a religion or spirituality or therapy that counters their thoughts of self-destruction; thoughts that cause anxiety, depression, suffering, hopelessness, frustration & suicide.



EVIL THOUGHTS FROM DEPRESSION/SATAN/CONFUSION

 

1)   ”Success means:   Money, popularity and good looks. I don’t have that so I’m a loser, worthless and without hope. The world would be better off without me. I have failed in life. I would rather be anyone other than me”.

 

 2)  “ I can’t be as good as or better than most people, so I’d rather be dead”.

 

 3)  "I can’t change myself with religion/ psychology/spirituality so, they don’t work”.

 

 

 

 4)  “I can’t stand living with my depression, headaches, stomach aches, back aches, dullness, rashes, dizziness, blurred vision, allergies, hypochondria, lack of interest in life, nightmares, lack of sleep, fear, anxiety, self-hatred, feelings of inferiority, sexual problems, relationship problems, side effects from medications, lack of success, no concentration, daydreaming, hatred of life, lack of love for my family, fear of Satan, lack of relationship with God, etc., so I should kill myself”.

 

  5) “People criticize, make fun of and hate me and so I must escape from my shameful existence”.

 

6)  "The devil/sad thoughts/anger is/are torturing me, it would be kinder to kill myself. They don’t let dogs suffer so why should humans? I’m in pain kill me or help me to kill myself”.

 

 

 

7)     “People like my possessions and wish I would die sooner, so maybe I’ll do them a favor”.

 

 

8)     “My chronic illness/pain/evil /guilt is too hard to bear day and night. God won’t kill me, so I’ll do it myself”.

 

 

9)     “No one should have to live such a sorrowful life”.

 

     

    

10)  “People are selfish, stupid and evil.    God is distant, impotent and uncaring. I am also selfish, stupid and evil, distant, impotent and uncaring. The animals are stupid, but at least they have no self-awareness & self-loathing”.

   

 

 

11)  “I might as well destroy, use up and take advantage of everyone and everything, because evil is all around”.

 

 

 

 

12)     “I’m smarter than everyone else, because I put my needs & goals of pleasure first.”

 

 

 

13)  “Religion, spirituality, politics and psychology are crutches for weak-minded persons who can’t admit that life is pointless. These belief systems give you tasks to do to take your mind off the awful truth that ‘We only have one life and then we die”.

 

14)  “My belief is that: ‘A  life, without more joy than pain should be ended’. That is the belief that I want to tell people about. Go to a country where Assisted Suicide is legal and do it. God wouldn’t want you to live in a life full of pain (I’m an atheist & ignorant of God). My purpose in life is to destroy any beliefs in life that don’t agree with mine. It may cause suffering, but false comforting, joyful beliefs that make you live longer and make you feel good about life are the enemy that you must kill, that I will kill”.

 

 

 

 

15)  “My family is ashamed of me. The honorable thing would be to become successful, move far away or kill myself. Since I can’t be successful with my depression, I’ll move away, but I’ll fail there too, so I’ll kill myself”.

 


 









 

 

 

 

 

 

16)  "If I don’t separate/divorce or kill myself, my family will suffer greatly, go into bankruptcy, and get depressed. For their sake I must kill myself”.

 


 








 

 

 

 

  17)  “I have no way out, I must kill myself”.

 


 






 

 

 

 

18)“If I fail to stick with and succeed at my obligations then I’ll be a failure or a quitter and I can’t tolerate that, I must kill myself”.

 


 






 

 

 

 

 19)  “If a suicidal thought comes into my head, then who am I to resist it or devalue it. It must be what I really want and I should never deny myself & I must follow my negative thoughts. I can ignore the neutral or positive thoughts, but it would be a crime against the Universe to fail to obey any negative thought I have”.

 

 

 

 

20)  “I hate God for making me this way. I’ll show him He had no right to create me and let me be miserable by killing myself”.

 

 

 

GOOD THOUGHTS FROM RELIGION/SPIRITUALITY/SELF HELP

 

1)      “Success is not money, popularity and good looks. I’m a winner because I’m alive. Helping others to survive this life, bringing a smile and lightening a load where ever I go. That is success”.

 

2)      “Sometimes I compare myself to others, but that’s foolish. I’m glad I’m alive”.

 

3)      “Nothing works 100% of the time, so I shouldn’t abandon things that help me much of the time. God/Life put me on earth for a purpose and I’m going to live until it’s my time to die”.

 

4)      “Most of the symptoms of my “illnesses” can be reduced when, I pay less attention to them; get good medical/mental treatments, and when I use natural cures, avoid allergens and use good hygiene every day”.

 



 

 

 

5)      “I can make a positive difference in the world by encouraging the good people, projects and ideas”.


6)      “I am the boss of my thoughts and ideas. I reject the bad and encourage the good based on the teachings of my belief, which were designed to make me and others happier”.

 



 

7)      “People must not depend on my wealth, but build up their own. Easy come easy go”.

 

8)      “I devote and dedicate my suffering to God. In spite of my sufferings I will love God and others cheerfully”. 

 

 

9)      “A sorrowful life is better than no life at all. To be born is a chance to live. 

 


 

10)  “We have peace with our fellow man/nature/selves, because we are in touch with God/A Superior Being/Concept/Ideal & we value our love & kindness because of our obedience & faith in these beliefs”. 

 


11)  “People who are more worried about helping others, than themselves are usually happier. Push back and reduce your evil with good”.

 

 


12)  “I’m not smarter than most people and certainly not smarter than God. The evil within me often blocks God’s voice”.

 

 

13)  “Keeping a sense of purpose & having something to do everyday is a good ‘crutch’ to have. What should I that would be better:  drink, commit crimes, & attack good people & governments?  I will help others and stop obsessing about my superiority”.


14)  “My Christian religion tells me to spread the Gospel or Good News of Christ, so people will be rescued from Hell and go to Heaven when they die. If I am persecuted or killed, by doing this, its ok, I HAVE DIED TO THIS LIFE AND NOW LIVE FOR CHRIST. I have died to evil thoughts and the taking of my own life in suicide. I have died to whining, complaining & lusting for life. The salvation of others is more important than my success in the material world. Your belief tells you something else, but both give us meaning”.

 


 

15)  “My family will be ashamed of me, whether I’m successful or not, because they want perfection and pure joy for me, which no one can achieve. They have to deal with their cruelty, fantasies and shame towards their children, but I must jump over my shame and reach for the next goal in my life. I must do my best and then I won’t have to be ashamed of failure or overly thrilled with success. I can only do the best, my best. If God, embryonic/fetal disease, accidents, funguses, bacteria, viruses, or genetics defects reduced my abilities, then you can go and complain to God about me. I’m proud that I did the best I could with my very few gifts and talents that God gave me. Jesus, (Pick your ideology or belief here) I’m proud of my weak and pathetic efforts, that took all of my strength. You are what I brag about, not myself”.

 

16)  I will offer my family the choice of whether they want me to leave them or they want to leave me. They always have and had that choice anyway, because we live in a free country. I’ll let them know that I love them and want to stay with them forever, but if they chose to leave me I’ll understand. Then if I’m on my own, I’ll adjust to it and spend more time treating my illness. I’ll also be there for them for their special events and anniversaries.  I’ll probably be more fun to be with, since the pressures of living with a family will be gone. I’ll be nicer to them, when I’m with them and if I’m causing stress they should know that I’ll be going home soon & so that will be a comfort to them.

 

17)  I don’t have to kill myself, ever. I can reduce the stresses in my life, by quitting a horrible job, leaving school, leaving family, leaving a bad relationship, quitting alcohol and drugs, etc. I can instead try to increase my happiness by joining a religion, a spiritual group, an artistic group, a therapist that I like, exercising regularly, doing things that I love (Even if I’ll never earn money or become famous) eating foods that make me feel good, etc.

 

 

18)  I must quit obligations that are strangling me and making me want to die. If I’m dead then I will abandon all of my obligations anyway, so why not abandon one of two of the most stressful ones now? I can replace them with what I’d prefer to do. There are many creative ways to meet your financial, social, family, educational, employment and friendship commitments. It’s scary to abandon what you have and hate for what your love but don’t have. Take a leap of faith and keep swimming until you reach your destination or at least enjoy the water.

 

19)  Evil thoughts are suggestions, aberrations & the opposite of good thoughts. I don’t pay attention to anything that wants to destroy me, causes me to quit or kill myself. If God wanted me dead, then he would let me die in an accident, through persecution, war or disease. So I must lift up life thoughts”.

 


 



20)  God must have created me for a reason that I don’t understand. He’s probably smarter and more loving than me, so I’ll assume that if I cooperate in my life with Him, I’ll be rewarded for it.

 

 

 

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